Ben Simmons Got Taller And Boston Fans Are Shitting Themselves

Hey Boston, you should take a look at what WE HAVE

Ben Simmons

–        7 FEET TALL Point Guard

–        Can pass better than Larry Bird

–        He’s like two feet taller than Isiah Thomas

Joel Embiid

–        8 Feet tall center

–        Can shoot better than Ray Allen in his prime

–        Better defender than Bill Russell

T.J McConnell

–        Really cool irish last name.

–        More grit than Dustin Pedroia

Dario Saric

–        Better than Larry Bird

Yeah, you might want to trade those picks for Paul George, Baston. The future is ours baby.

Written by Mike Cloran

Image Sources: Philly Influencer, Pittsburgh Post-Gazzette, John Raoux

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